I love affirmations.
Having been brought up with a father who thought that anything vaguely ‘woo’ was a ‘con’ I had a healthy scepticism for anything to do with self-improvement for many years.
Until I realised I needed help in my life. And the best place to start was by helping myself. And so began my journey into self-improvement. And now all I ever think about the self improvement world is, “Why didn’t I start sooner.”
And it was the same with affirmations. That time my father didn’t need to do the work for me. I dismissed affirmation / the law of attraction / anything to do with manifesting as totally ‘woo’.
Until, that is, I realised this: If you are going to achieve anything you can do it with a negative attitude or a positive attitude. The positive attitude will probably get you there and the negative attitude is highly unlikely to get you there. But then I realised just how bad my thoughts were and how negatively I spoke to myself about everything. This is how I started journaling: Because I could hear my thoughts and identify where I was thinking negatively by writing my thoughts down.
So then I started to investigate affirmations and realised just how life changing they are.
I wonder what your journey has been like, whether it’s similar to mine or totally different?
So now we come to the interesting subject of affirmations not for ourselves, but for our significant other, the boyfriend or the man in your life, whatever his title 🙂
This time round I’m on board. I’m all in on affirmations and totally all in on any form of self help or self-improvement.
But I do have one tiny ‘but’ around creating affirmations for the boyfriend.
And this is my ‘but’.
Shouldn’t affirmations be part of your relationship anyway and not something that has to be singled out?
Isn’t that what we do in loving relationships? Affirm each other?
Maybe I’m being a bit picky. I mean, most of us could benefit from a bit of advice to help us improve our relationship. And maybe giving verbal praise, or words of affirmation, to our loved one isn’t our natural inclination and so we might actually have to learn how to do that.
Maybe, for example, our natural inclination might be to give gifts, or perform an act of service to our loved one and not tell him how much we love him, or admire him, or find him funny.
Which brings me nicely onto a topic I’d like to deal with briefly and that is the 5 love languages. Words of affirmation are one of the five love languages.
The five love languages, as described by Dr. Gary Chapman, offer insights into how individuals prefer to express and receive love. Each language plays a significant role in fostering a healthy and loving relationship.
The five love languages
Words of Affirmation
Expressing positive affirmations and using words of encouragement is a powerful way to show love. By affirming your partner’s worth and expressing admiration, you contribute to their self-esteem and make them feel appreciated.
Spending dedicated and undivided time with your best friend or partner is a great way to deepen your connection. During tough times, being there for them and actively listening can be a big help in strengthening your bond.
Acts of Service
Showing love through acts of service, such as helping with chores or fulfilling your partner’s needs, demonstrates your commitment and care. It is about going the extra mile to support your loved one and make their life easier.
Physical touch, whether through hugs, kisses, or holding hands, is a powerful way to express love. It can provide a sense of comfort and intimacy, contributing to a loving and affectionate relationship.
Giving thoughtful gifts that align with your partner’s interests and expressing gratitude for the little things can have a positive impact. It’s not about the monetary value but rather the expression of love and consideration.
Understanding and speaking your partner’s primary love language allows you to meet their needs in the best way possible. By doing so, you become a better person and create a loving, lasting relationship. Dr. Gary Chapman’s concept of love languages reminds us that expressing love in different ways is essential for a fulfilling partnership. It’s about finding joy in each other’s company, being each other’s best thing, and embracing the power of positive energy and affirmation. Ultimately, it’s about creating a loving, happy relationship where both partners feel valued and cherished every single day.
Now that we have dealt with the 5 love languages I’d like to get on to talking about some words of affirmation that you could use with your boyfriend.
Different types of words of affirmation
Words of affirmation can be a powerful way to express love, appreciation, and encouragement to your boyfriend. Here are some different types of words of affirmation you can use:
Offer genuine compliments about his appearance, personality, skills, or achievements. For example:
You always look so handsome.”
“I’m so proud of how hard you work.”
“You have such a great sense of humour. You always make me laugh.”
You are an amazing man and a great role model. I’m grateful to have you as my boyfriend.”
“Your inner strength inspires me during hard times. You always find a way to overcome obstacles.”
“In our healthy relationship, you fill my love tank and bring me so much joy every day.”
“I appreciate how you listen to me and understand my needs. You’re a good listener and always make me feel valued.”
“You’re a hard worker, and I admire your commitment and dedication to your daily routine.”
“Your positive attitude is contagious, and it makes every day better. You truly have a powerful and uplifting presence.”
“I’m grateful for your unconditional love. You make me feel worthy of love in every possible way.”
“You are my dream guy, and being with you is the perfect way to experience real love.”
“Your words of affirmation are powerful tools that have helped me become a better woman. Thank you for your support and encouragement.”
“You are an incredible person in every aspect. Your love, kindness, and intelligence make you the best person I know.”
These might sound a little formal, so do personalize these affirmations with specific details about your boyfriend and your relationship. Speak from the heart and let him know how much he means to you.
Express gratitude for his actions, qualities, or the way he supports you. For example:
“I appreciate how you always listen to me when I need to talk.”
“Thank you for being so patient with me.”
“I’m grateful for your unwavering support and love.”
“I appreciate how you always support my dreams and aspirations. You encourage me to be the best version of myself.”
“Your love language is a powerful concept that has brought so much depth and understanding to our romantic relationship.”
“You have come such a long way in your personal growth journey. I admire how you have become a stronger person through challenges.”
“I’m grateful for the good things we share together. Our favourite place holds many wonderful memories that I cherish.”
“Thank you for understanding and empathizing with me during my bad days. Your support helps me overcome negative thoughts.”
“In our relationship, you make an extra effort to learn and speak my love language. It truly shows how much you care.”
“You consistently do a great job in everything you take on. Your dedication and hard work inspire me every day.”
“Your words of affirmation are a testament to the power of affirmations. They uplift my spirits and make me feel loved.”
“I’m grateful for the simple ways you show your love and appreciation. Even the little gifts you give bring me so much joy.”
“You understand the needs of your partner and make our love life a priority. Being with you is always a good time.”
Remember to tailor these affirmations to reflect specific qualities, actions, or situations that you appreciate about your boyfriend. Let him know how much he means to you and how his presence enriches your life.
Provide words that motivate and inspire him to pursue his goals and dreams. For example:
“I believe in you and know you can achieve anything you set your mind to.”
“You have incredible talent. Don’t be afraid to show it to the world.”
“I’m here to support you every step of the way. You’ve got this!”
“You have a wonderful way of expressing yourself through the written word. Your words of affirmation have a powerful impact on me.”
“I admire your commitment to being a hard-working man. Your dedication and perseverance inspire me to strive for greatness.”
“You consistently prioritize understanding and speaking your partner’s love language. Your efforts create a strong and loving connection.”
“I believe in you and your ability to make the right choices. Trust yourself and know that I’m here to support you.”
“In our committed relationship, we embrace our different interests and encourage each other to pursue our passions.”
“You have a positive manner that uplifts those around you. Your optimism and kindness make a significant difference in people’s lives.”
“You are a man of integrity, and it shows in everything you do. Your honesty and authenticity are admirable qualities.”
“I appreciate how you prioritize the needs of your partner. Your thoughtfulness and consideration create a strong foundation for our relationship.”
“You have the power to overcome any challenge that comes your way. Believe in yourself and know that you are capable of achieving great things.”
“I want to remind you that you are a wonderful person deserving of love and happiness. Embrace your best words of affirmation and believe in your own worth.”
Remember, encouragement is about instilling confidence and motivation in your partner. Tailor these affirmations to reflect his unique qualities and the specific situations where he may need a boost. Let him know that you believe in him and his abilities.
Share your love and affection for him openly. For example:
“I love you more than words can express.”
“You mean the world to me, and I’m so lucky to have you in my life.”
“Being with you makes every day brighter and more fulfilling.”
“I love you more than words can express. You are the centre of my world.”
“You bring so much joy and happiness into my life. I am grateful to have you by my side.”
“Every day spent with you is a blessing. I cherish the moments we share together.”
“Your love fills my heart with warmth and contentment. I am so lucky to be loved by you.”
“You are my rock and my safe haven. Your presence brings me a sense of peace and security.”
“I am endlessly grateful for your unwavering support and unconditional love. You complete me.”
“You are not only my partner but also my best friend. I can’t imagine my life without you.”
“Your touch and affectionate gestures make me feel cherished and loved. I feel so lucky to be yours.”
“Being with you makes every day better. Your love has transformed my life in the most beautiful way.”
“You are the person I have been searching for my whole life. With you, I have found true love.”
Speak from the heart and let your genuine affection and love shine through in your words of affirmation. Customise these affirmations to reflect the unique qualities and dynamics of your relationship.
Offer reassurance and understanding during difficult times. For example:
“I’m here for you, no matter what. You don’t have to face this alone.”
“I’m proud of your strength and resilience in the face of challenges.”
“Remember that I believe in you, and we’ll get through this together.”
“I am here for you, no matter what. You don’t have to face your challenges alone.”
“You are stronger than you realize. I believe in your ability to overcome any obstacles in your path.”
“Your feelings are valid, and I am here to listen and provide a safe space for you to express yourself.”
“I admire your strength and resilience in the face of adversity. You have the power to overcome anything.”
“Remember that it’s okay to ask for help when you need it. I am here to support you in any way I can.”
“You are not defined by your past or your mistakes. I love and accept you for who you are in this moment.”
“Take all the time you need to heal and process your emotions. I’ll be right here, supporting you every step of the way.”
“You have an incredible inner strength that will guide you through difficult times. Trust yourself and your instincts.”
“It’s okay to feel overwhelmed or uncertain. I am here to provide comfort and reassurance when you need it most.”
“No matter what happens, I will always be by your side. Together, we can face anything that comes our way.”
Remember, emotional support is about being present, understanding, and offering reassurance. Tailor these affirmations to address your partner’s specific needs and emotions. Let them know that they are not alone and that you are there to support them through thick and thin.
Remember, the most important aspect of using words of affirmation is to be sincere and genuine. Tailor your affirmations to his unique qualities and the specific situations you want to address. By doing so, you can make a positive impact on your boyfriend’s self-esteem, confidence, and overall well-being.
I love these affirmations and hope that you do too.
But there is another question I’m keen to answer.
Do affirmations have to be verbal, or can they be non-verbal?
Verbal v non-verbal affirmations
Affirmations can be both verbal and non-verbal, depending on personal preference and individual interpretation. Traditionally, affirmations are statements or phrases that are repeated aloud or silently in order to reinforce positive beliefs, change negative thought patterns, or manifest desired outcomes. Verbal affirmations involve speaking or whispering the affirmations to oneself or others.
However, affirmations don’t necessarily have to be limited to verbal expression. They can also be non-verbal in nature. Some people find that visualizing positive images, symbols, or scenarios can be just as effective as speaking affirmations. Non-verbal affirmations can include activities like creating vision boards, writing down positive statements, using gesture or body language, or even practicing mindfulness or meditation techniques.
Ultimately, the effectiveness of affirmations, whether verbal or non-verbal, can vary from person to person. It’s important to choose the approach that resonates with you and aligns with your beliefs and preferences. Experimenting with different methods can help you find what works best for you.
Here are some non-verbal affirmations that you can use on your boyfriend
- Physical touch: Show affection through gentle touches, hugs, cuddling, or holding hands to convey your love and support.
- Eye contact: Maintain meaningful eye contact with your boyfriend to express connection, understanding, and appreciation without words.
- Smiling: Offer genuine smiles to convey happiness, warmth, and joy in his presence.
- Acts of service: Perform thoughtful gestures or tasks that demonstrate your care and support, such as cooking his favourite meal or doing something special for him.
- Surprise gifts: Surprise your boyfriend with small tokens of affection, such as his favourite snack, a handwritten note, or a thoughtful gift that reflects his interests.
- Listening attentively: Show active listening by giving your full attention when he speaks, nodding or providing affirming gestures to indicate understanding and support.
- Physical presence: Be there for him physically during important moments or difficult times, offering a comforting presence that reassures him of your support.
- Non-verbal encouragement: Use non-verbal cues like a thumbs-up, a pat on the back, or a reassuring nod to communicate your encouragement and belief in him.
- Shared activities: Engage in activities that bring you both joy and create shared positive experiences, reinforcing your bond and affirming your relationship.
- Non-verbal displays of affection: Show your love and affection through small gestures like a gentle touch on his arm, a playful wink, or a loving gaze that convey your feelings without words.
Remember that communication in any relationship is important, so while non-verbal affirmations can be powerful, it’s also essential to combine them with verbal expressions of love, appreciation, and support.
Finally, I want to address the subject of what are you going to do with this information, how can you remember to use it and make it a regular part of your relationship communication? It’s great to read all these lists of affirmations, a sure-fire dopamine hit guaranteed to make you feel better.
However unless you record anything in life, and track it, it will fall by the wayside. So, rather than letting this be yet another blog post that gets you all fired up, only to forget about it tomorrow, here is a way of tracking this information in your journal that will help you to remember what you have read and the changes you want to make to your relationship that will take it to the next level.
How to use your journal for affirmations for boyfriend/fiancé/husband/partner
Use your journal to set out the next 30 days. You can date the pages if you like, or just write out a timeframe at the beginning of the pages
Each day make a note of how you feel about your boyfriend (I’m going to write boyfriend, but this equally applies to fiancés, husbands, partners, so replace boyfriend with whichever word is applicable. Be honest. It’s ok if you feel grumpy that he came home late and woke you up, or worried because he’s been unusually quiet. Just write it all down.
Then, each day, make a note of the affirmation(s) that you are going to use on your boyfriend. There are plenty above to choose from!
At the end of each day make a note of when you used your affirmation(s). Also make a note on whether he visibly changed as a result of your affirming words.
And this is the next bit that you shouldn’t miss. Also make a note on how you feel before and after delivering your affirmation. Did you change mood? Did you soften towards him? Or were you matter of fact? Whatever it is, make a note of it.
Keep going until day 30.
I think you will be quite surprised by what you see and feel. Most probably you will discover that a small amount of attention is so helpful. You will also most probably discover more about yourself and your boyfriend other than just the effect that an affirmation can have.
So go ahead and get going. It’s not going to cost you any money, but it could just transform your relationship.
Finally, there is a chance that words of affirmation are just not your boyfriend’s cup of tea. I know, right, how can this be? Some people just don’t respond to words of affirmation. If that is the case, it’s ok, you have 4 other love languages to chose from! Pivot, discover what your boyfriend’s true love language is and perform that service for him.
Good luck! Who knows where this will take your relationship when you intentionally shower your partner with affirmations and appreciation for the next 30 days.
I hope you have enjoyed this blog. Congratulations on getting to the end!
We have other similar blogs on affirmations that you can read. If you’d like to read more on affirmations then try:
Powerful who I am in Christ affirmations for your journal
Words of affirmation for daughters